How Often Should I Talk to My 12 Step Sponsor?


The relationship you build with your 12 step sponsor will be a special one.  Your sponsor will be there to help you through your recovery and share with you the lessons they have learned in their own sobriety.  Much like any other relationship, regular communication is vital for the bond between you and your sponsor to remain strong.  

How often you talk to you sponsor will vary depending on many different factors: how far along you are in your recovery, the dynamic of the relationship, etc.  Early on in your recovery, you will talk to your sponsor more often than you will as you get further along in your sobriety.  While the number of times you speak with your sponsor may not matter, there are certain times that it is imperative that you speak with them:

When Starting a New Romantic Relationship

Romantic relationships can be tough for anyone, they can be even harder when struggling with an addiction.  Talking to your sponsor about a new relationship will make sure they are on the lookout for any potential triggers.  When you are involved in a new relationship you may not notice things that could cause you to slip up in your sobriety.  Your sponsor will have the objective eyes required to catch any possible landmines.

When You Start to Think You Can Beat Addiction

It is not uncommon for people to underestimate the power of their addiction after they have been sober for a while.    This underestimation can lead to a relapse thinking you have your addiction under control.   If you find yourself thinking you do not your sponsor, that is a good sign that you need to call them.

You Start Questioning Whether or Not You Can Stay Sober

Maintaining your sobriety can be a daunting task and at times you may start to worry if it is something you can do.  Your sponsor can remind you how far you’ve come and return your focus to taking your recovery one day at a time.

You Are Thinking About Relapsing

This is where your sponsor will prove to be the most valuable.  By calling your sponsor when you first begin thinking about a relapse, they have the opportunity to talk you off the ledge before you take the next step towards a relapse.


The Lakehouse Recovery Center offers 30, 60, and 90 day programs to men and women seeking to recover from drug and alcohol addiction. In addition to providing excellent clinical care, we offer both recovery and non-recovery activities. Our goal is to show clients how to have fun again, learning how to live in recovery without drugs and alcohol. For information, call us today: 877.762.3707


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