What If I Don’t Feel Like Being Social?

Most newly sober people can relate to the feeling of discomfort when faced with social situations. Many worry about what to say, how to act, and where to hold your hands now that a cocktail won’t be in your grip. These feelings are normal and most people in recovery have gone through the same growing pains. Be patient with yourself, it will get better. In the meantime, here are some tips to help you get through the awkwardness unscathed:

  1. Have Willingness – As long as it doesn’t involve drinking or doing drugs, be willing to go and do whatever it is that other sober people are doing. If they invite you to coffee after a meeting, go with them. Recovery is a new experience, and though trying things you didn’t do in addiction may be intimidating, it is important to put yourself out there and in the middle of the herd.
  2. Listen – People like to talk about themselves, and they also like others to listen. Pay attention to the person with whom you are speaking so that the next tip comes easily.
  3. Ask Questions – In addition to talking about themselves, people also like others who show interest in them. It makes us feel good when someone seems interested in what we are saying. Plus, if you don’t feel comfortable talking about yourself, it puts the limelight on the other person while you learn more about them.
  4. Make Eye Contact and Smile – Body language is more powerful than you think. Avoiding eye contact subconsciously suggests feelings of guilt, shame, or embarrassment—none of which you need to feel, ever. Smiling suggests openness and being friendly. As animals, we are drawn to those who are non-threatening, and a smile welcomes others to do the same.


You may not feel like you know who you really are just yet, but know that you are enough. Stay where your feet are, and remember that what other people think of you is none of your business. Recovery isn’t easy, but it is so worth it. Be gentle on yourself, and keep going.




If you are struggling with addiction, call The Lakehouse Recovery Center. We understand how difficult life is right now, but trust that we can help you through it. You are not alone. Give us a call, we are available 24/7, toll-free at (877) 762-3707. We will give you the tools you need to live life on life’s terms. You can recover. Take this opportunity, and call now.


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