Feelings of abandonment are real. While many people may believe abandonment issues as only exist in children, an increased number of studies are showing that not only are abandonment issues real in adults, they are also being found as a root cause for mental health problems such as depression and PTSD. Feelings of abandonment should be addressed with a professional but often times people who suffer avoid treatment because they think they have always felt this way it will never change. These feelings of hopelessness will often lead to an attempt to self-medicate by abusing drugs or alcohol. If you or a love can identify with one or more of these traits, talking to a professional can help you to enjoy a fuller life.
They quickly form attachments
Many people who suffer from abandonment issues will often find themselves quickly building attachments to new people in their life. These attachments are often romantic but they can also be maternal or paternal connections to people with authority like mentors or supervisors. Feelings of abandonment can cause a person to pull people into their lives hoping to make up for whatever caused them to originally feel abandoned.
They are perfectionists
A child’s mind can be very egotistical leading them to blame themselves when they feel abandoned. These internal feelings of guilt can lead the child to grow up feeling like they are never quite good enough. This fear can lead to problems with work, relationships and can even lead to depression. By always chasing unattainable perfection people with abandonment issues may frequently find themselves under immense stress. The physical strain stress can put on the body has been shown to lead to many health problems including heart disease.
They are terrified of commitment
Many people who suffer from feelings of abandonment may develop commitment issues and often become “serial daters”. In hopes of preventing any further pain, people that have been abandoned may not allow themselves to get close to a person again. This fear of commitment can often lead to self-sabotage as relationships become too close. People with abandonment issues begin starting fights or getting upset with their partners for irrational reasons or no reason at all. Even when self-inflicted, people will use their failed relationships as a way of justifying their fear of being unlovable.
The Lakehouse Recovery Center offers 30, 60, and 90 day programs to men and women seeking to recover from drug and alcohol addiction. In addition to providing excellent clinical care, we offer both recovery and non-recovery activities. Our goal is to show clients how to have fun again, learning how to live in recovery without drugs and alcohol. For information, call us today: 877.762.3707