3 Statements Not To Make About A Loved One’s Addiction

Watching someone you love struggle with addiction is an experience nobody should have to endure, but many do. In your effort to “drive the point home” or “break through” the wall of addiction in your loved one, try to avoid these three statements.

“There’s Something Wrong With You. You Need Help.”

Nobody wants to be told that they have a problem which necessitates an outside opinion. This is one of the few crossover statements that are sometimes necessary to provide. Addiction and alcoholism are delusional states of mind in which the person addicted believes they can still drink or use drugs like normal people. In the brains of addicts and alcoholics, there is something wrong and they do need help. If you’re going to use a statement like this one, it is critical to follow up with asking, “How can I help?”

“What’s So Bad in Your Life That You Need to Use Drugs and Alcohol This Way?”

In many ways the circumstances of life do and do not have to do with an addict’s choice to use drugs or alcohol. During treatment, there is a focus on underlying issues and investigating the past to trace how addictive behaviors developed. Most who develop a substance abuse problem have experienced some form of trauma in their lives, for example. However, the nature of addiction is that at some point it ceases to matter whether or not things in life are good or bad.

When things are good, addicts and alcoholics will still use drugs and alcohol. When things are bad, addicts and alcoholics will use drugs and alcohol to cope. If quitting the abuse of substances were simply a matter of how good or bad things were in life, millions more who are struggling with addiction would be sober.

“Why Are You Still Acting This Way Now That You’re Clean?”

After the drugs and alcohol are taken away, a question has to be asked. Did the drug and alcohol problem create the personality or did the personality create the drug and alcohol problem? It can take time for all of addict behavior to change.

Going to treatment and seeking recovery from drug and alcohol addiction is about more than just quitting the abuse of drugs and  alcohol. Recovery requires a total change of mind, body, and spirit, which takes time.


Lakehouse Recovery Center knows that there is a solution for addiction. Our residential treatment program offers a small and intimate experience from our beautiful lakefront home in Southern California. Integrative activities and clinical therapy help our clients heal mind, body, and spirit, while showing them that life is worth living without drugs and alcohol. For more information, call us today: 877.762.3707


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